I Spy With My Judgmental Eye…

This is a list of some of my favorite things spotted at the gym, which oddly enough happened to be some of my least favorite things spotted at the gym... All can be found at the VanWinkle Gold’s (formerly referred to as the “pretty people gym” (note I said “formerly”)) on any given night. Two trips max and you can take in ALL its wonder and glory. It’s a beautiful thing.

• Naked lady in the locker room. wobbly bits, lots of wobbly bits...
• Man in sweat pants (the kind with elastic ankles). It makes me very VERY! uncomfortable.
• Beth, Dog the Bounty Hunter's wife, sans the class and blond hair. Possibly bigger boobs…
• Man sporting the gallon milk jug of water. Dude, dumbbells are included in your membership.
• Camel toe
• Moose knuckles
• Nutter jean shorts… accompanied by moose knuckles.
• Brandon Walsh from 90210, but with facial hair.
• Royal Blue, velvet track suite, with matching scrunchy and soup can bangs.
• Ru! Fi! OOOooooo!……. Bangerang
• 'Roid: The man clearly on steroids and ALWAYS at the gym.
• ‘Roid. wearing the barely there “tank” in camo… I refer to it as the upside down thong.
• The real life version of the Homies figurines
• And finally, the mirror poser. Can’t get enough of himself and neither can I…

Hypocrite!

Let it be known that I am adamantly against Christmas before I’ve filled my cornucopia and celebrated the pilgrimage to Plymouth Rock. I just don’t see the need to be putting up mistletoe before I have completed my hand print turkey and I can’t exactly “deck the halls” or roast chestnuts over an open fire, before I’ve roasted the turkey and done my Black Friday shopping at the Walmart. I don’t know, call me crazy!

I’ve noticed that not everyone sees things my way. In fact Sad FM, Easy Listening for the Over 30, started playing Christmas music on November 1. A little Premature? I think so! But rather than change my pre-set I just decided to steer clear of the station, a personal boycott if you will.

While listening to the radio on my way to work this morning, I was singing along to one of my favorite songs thinking “I love this song, I wish I heard it more often” when suddenly I realized the reason I don’t hear it very much is because IT’S A CHRISTMAS SONG! And I am the biggest hypocrite ever because here I am, supposedly boycotting Sad FM and its all Christmas music all season long philosophy and I’m singing along to the words “last Christmas I gave you my heart and the very next day, you gave it away. This year to save me from tears, I’ll give it to someone special...” pathetic! In both song choice and principal. PATHETIC!